Just get through today

Let me start off with the Good news before I have a petty party for myself.

This is totally UN IVF related but me and DH went on a date night this past Saturday. We haven’t been out to any of our local Casinos in years so we decided to go test our luck! Good thing we did I will spare you all the details but I hit one of the small jackpots and won $5000 (freaking amazing) I mean seriously I was left speechless. We had already won a little over $1000 before I hit this. So it was a great night!!

The crazy thing is when we had gotten are meds and received the good luck note. My first thought was, does luck have anything to do with it? I thought, well I hope luck is on my side. Well luck showed up on Saturday night and I pray it sticks around for the next few months!!

Ok on to my appointment today.

I have to say I almost cried when the Dr. left the office after my ultra sounds and physical. This is going to be TMI but apparently my Va jay jay is slightly discolored which is a sign of low insulin (seriously?) and apparently a sign on getting Diabetes later in life also the Dr. (not my own) told me and I quote” you have really lumpy breast nothing I would be too concerned about though.” I mean seriously I was about 5 minutes into my appointment and I was told I have a funky colored Va jay jay and lumpy breast!! (It’s a little funny when I think about it now) Let’s just say I wasn’t feeling great by the time we actually got to the magic wand!!

During the ultra sound the Dr. pointed out a cyst in my Ovary that I wasn’t told about last time. I specifically remember the last Dr. point to that same object and telling me it was a lg follicle. The Dr. told me no that it was even in the notes from my last appointment and that she seen 5 follicles and 1 cyst. Um excuse me last time I was there they told me 6 follicles and never mentioned a cyst I mean come on I’m pretty sure this is something I would remember. She told me not to worry about it. That she doesn’t think it is messing with my hormones level because it would have showed up last time. She thinks?  That’s just not what I wanted to hear. Now I have to wait for the call later today to here if we are still a go.

I’m really not sure how I’m going to get through all of this. I’m really a mess right now. I don’t know what I was expecting going into this appointment. I mean I knew my ovary wasn’t going to magically have more follicles. I think when I go in its just such a reminder that my body isn’t normal and well that makes me sad, pissed and everything in between!